I Hear You and I’m Here to Help You
by Michael Starr-Desnomie
The day that Meredith Newman came to visit BFCHS, it was an
honor to meet her finally. She was Corey O’Soup’s assistant and she came all
the way from Saskatoon. She came a long way to meet us. When I first met her I thought
she was going to be short, but when I looked up, she was taller than me. I felt
short. My classmates and I shook her hand and said our names.
I spoke with her on the phone about two or three weeks
before. I had told Miss.Koops when I was reading the book’ Shhh…
Listen We Have Something to Say Youth voices From the North that I couldn’t
get through the first four pages because of reading and learning a lot of
indigenous kids are needing help.
Young kids committing suicide had a lot of impact on my
heart. I was shaking. I was hearing all of those kids’ voices saying, “Michael help
me.” I couldn’t sit down, not even for a minute. I needed to talk to somebody
about it ASAP.
When I went to tell my teacher she said, “You want me to
call somebody for you?” Because of what I had read in the book I wanted to take
action as soon as possible. Miss. Koops phoned Meredith, so that I could talk
to her and say what I really needed to say.
When I was talking on the phone with Meredith I told her
that mostly, what I really want to do, is to help every single kid and youth
from the north. I heard their voices and I’m willing to help them until the day
that they cremate me.
I will be watching over them and telling the creator to send
his best warriors down to earth to help our people. When Meredith came to see
us I told her that I have some ideas that can help the kids from the north to
make them go on the right path not the dark path, because the creator made us
for a reason. He gave us all gifts that we don’t know about, that we have to
find out for ourselves.
They have to remember what runs through their veins. Their
ancestors are always here to help as well. They can go to sweats to speak to an
elder, to tell them what’s going on, so they can help them heal and make them
better. They can go to ceremonies to make them who they really are on the
inside and find who they can really be.
These kids need our help. I will do everything and anything
to help out the kids from the north even if it takes my last breath. When I was
talking to Meredith in the culture room I was telling her about the time I read
my poem.
The very first time on Orange Shirt Day and that I got
invited to the Saskatchewan School Board Association (SSBA) and told her that
it went viral, but I was mostly talking about the book, that I wanted to help
with and help every single kid. I told her that kids don’t deserve the things
they’re going through. I know how they feel and I know their pain.
I’ve been through it as well. I battled my demons. I tried
to fight it alone, but I couldn’t do it by myself. I needed help. I told my
family and my parents, but I didn’t tell them in the first 3 to 4 years it was
happening, and each year it got worse and worse. My mom asked my moshum if she,
my mom, could make a sweat and she did. She went to get cloths and tobacco for it.
My mom did a lot for me and I’m very thankful for that.
I told Meredith that I went through the same things like
those kids and that’s why I wanted to take action as soon as possible. No kid
deserves to be left out when they need help and I will always be here for them
because I’m not going anywhere. I take good care of my people and will always
always be there for them. I’m not going to let any kid be left out and I will
help them until the end.
I hear their voices and I’m willing to do anything for them.
I am telling everything that was in my heart to Meredith. It was a good feeling
to tell her what I can do to help even just telling stories that I heard from
an elder. I told her about the animals’ nature, things she hadn’t heard of. She
was surprised. She helped me by hearing every single word that I was saying
that can help with this book and for the kids from the north.
When Meredith was about to leave I gave her tobacco that I
used to bless the food with. I gave it to her and told her, “I want to give you
this tobacco for you to return to your home fire and loved ones.” She was
almost crying because she hadn’t got something as special as that before.
When she went out the door I prayed for her and for a safe
trip back home. I also prayed to my thunderbird brothers to guide her safely
back to her home fire. It was an honor meeting her and speaking heart to heart
with her.
