Finding My Voice

By Lacey Missens

Lacey on a Treaty Walk in Fort Qu'Appelle last September

 

I’m sitting here, thinking to myself, what should I write down? when I have so many things I could say to myself and everyone around me. I just don’t know how to put my words on the page. I do know I have a voice and the people around me know I do; still, I’m just trying to find mine when I’m in front of crowds.

These are my thoughts during the Kairos Blanket Exercise. I was always a shy person and many times I didn’t want to read the Blanket Exercise script. I would watch my classmates. Every time I would try to step up, I would try to say I wanted to finally read, but I would start thinking to myself I know I won’t be able to do this because people around me will doubt me and my thoughts would listen to those people and I would start to doubt my own self.  

When I went to Balgonie, I read for the first time. It was hard for me because that’s when my thoughts came into my head and I would start to have bad thoughts. For many people around me, they could speak in front of the crowd because they found their voices and everyone has a story.

Lacey reading from the Kairos Blanket Exercise script

for the first time in Balgonie, second from the right

When I found out about this class, I didn’t know what I was getting into. When I walked in on the first day we were in a talking circle and there weren’t too many people around me. I was still scared to speak up; to this day I’m still learning who I am and what I could actually do to motivate other people around me. I did learn that I shouldn’t care about what other people think about me when I do speak. People around you will listen to what you’ve got to say for yourself.

My goal from now to the end of the year is… I hope I will find my voice. I know I can see a difference from my first day in this class to present day. I’m slowly starting to find my voice in me. I just think you should never give up on what you believe in and push yourself to the good things in life instead of the negative.

Back row, Left to Right: Lacey, Taish, Jason Weitzel (principal of Balgonie)

Raimey, Glen, Kisis Cappo (from Balcarres) and Raven

Front row, Left to Right: Austin, Calen, Michael

 

My Year

by Raven Cook

 

Lately I’ve been asking myself “Is everything I’m doing going to be worth it?”

We’re two months into 2018. The whole thing with New Year’s resolutions (New Year, new me) has me thinking about what I want to change about myself. I have probably failed most of my resolutions already, haha. But when we fail at something we can choose to let it break us or we can choose to learn from our failure and come back stronger.

The more I've thought about it, I’ve noticed I have a lot of things to look forward to my last semester of high school. With days going by so fast, I guess I’ve been scared for this semester to end. Things I look forward to is travelling with my “oski-family”; finally graduating high school; and continuing my journey. I think these next few months will probably be some of my favourite and will help me find some sense of self.

When I turned 20, I had this feeling that it’s actually going to be “my year.” The year I find some true happiness and my happiness won’t be temporary, like I’m so used to it being. The support I have from my “oski-family” makes me feel I can keep going.  

Everything I’ve done with Oski-pimohtahtamwak otayisīniwiwaw has always been worth doing. So I think the answer I’ve been looking for is “yes, it’s all going to be worth it.” Everything will be okay.

 

 

 

 

The Most Loving Group Hug

The Most Loving Group Hug
by Michael Starr-Desnomie

The day when we got on the bus I was really pumped to go to a different school to show people about the Kairos Blanket Exercise, sharing the history of Canada that they didn’t know about. Driving to Regina was a good, looking out the windows and seeing beautiful land and animals.

When we got to Mother Theresa Middle School I knew it was a Catholic school. I and my brother were outside of school grounds having a smoke before we went in. Walking into the school, looking around, it was a pretty nice school, I've got to say.

We met Evan Whitestar who told us that he grew up in Fort Qu’Appelle. He told us all that he did for the Fort. It was good to meet another Fort kid that became big. He was telling me and my classmates about the history that he had in the Fort. He knew a couple people that played for the Fort Knox and that went into the WHL. I didn’t know that. It was great hearing what he was saying, what he did when he lived in the Fort. When he was done talking to us the principal, Terri Cote, showed us the gym so we could get set up for the Blanket Exercise.

 

 

The Blanket Exercise went good; there were over 60 kids in the gym, all in a circle. After the blanket exercise we always ask the people to get into a circle so we can talk about how we think and feel. Some of the kids in the circle didn’t want to speak, so I was waiting until it was my turn.

At the beginning I told my brother Taish I’m going to pour my heart out. I bro-handshaked him, then went back to the talking circle, waiting for my turn.

I was the last one to speak.

When it was my turn I stood up.  

I spoke my heart out. I was telling all of them, “You are all leaders and family to me.” I also told them, “I don’t care what color you are, I care for each and every one of you like family. I give you – each and every one of you – Much Love and Respect."

 

I told them about the kids from the north that are needing our help and I told them my reactions. How I couldn’t get through the first 4 pages on the book called Shhh… Listen We Have Something to Say. I told them what I wanted to do. How I was feeling on that day. That I needed to talk to someone about how I wanted to help them and on the ideas that would work for them. I felt their pain. I know what they went through, and don’t call me crazy, but I heard their voices in my head saying help me Michael.

I couldn’t sit down or stay still for a long time. Told them who I talked to on the phone, what I told them, how I was feeling and what was on my heart. There was a lot of pressure on my heart. I told them I don’t care what people say if I cry in front of people, it shows me that I’m a true man, standing my ground, speaking my heart out to people, telling them how my life is, like the Blanket Exercise told them my history, how it all made me the man that I am today, how it made me became a great leader.

When I was done talking I told them all thank you. One of my teachers, Sherie McKay, who was helping us with the blanket exercise said, “Michael deserves a group hug” and I said, “If you guys want, I’m a hugger.”

Some kids came running up to me and hugged me, then all 60 kids came up and hugged me. Well, I got a good group hug with mostly all of them.

They told me that what I said, it touched all of them and I felt happy and loved by all of them. It was an amazing feeling. I had never gotten a group hug in a Blanket Exercise. I’ve got to say, that was the best Blanket Exercise that I have ever had.